Midget Farm The Sequel
by Evil-Queen-Charlotte
Summary: title should explain
1. Trailer

Rate: Unrated (too stupid to be rated)

This isn't your typical farm!

"Wakey wakey midgets!" yelled Ketsueki.

An abandoned building…

"Whee the middle nowhere," said Momiji.

A one person tent…

"I get the tent, you outside," said KJ.

Farmyard songs…

"Short people got no reason…" sang Kuro and Ketsueki.

Morning activities…

"MASH THE MIDGETS!" yelled Kuro.

Odd food…

"We're having corn nuts for dinner tonight!" yelled Ketsueki.

And the most feared thing ever…

"Don't make me use the … (echo voice) horse tranquilizer (end echo voice)," threatened Ketsueki.

There's glomping…

Ketsueki glomps Gaara

Flying…

Kuro flies above the heads of the midgets as the jump to try and get her.

Hugging…

Momiji hugs KJ and with a puff of smoke turns into a rabbit, not a bunny, a rabbit.

And really bad music…

Ketsueki plays her sax out if tune.

Staring:

Ketsueki the Raccoon Demon…

…Kuro the Lightning Demon/ Vampire…

…And of course the midgets…

(in one breath) KJ the Shadow Demon, Hiei the Fire Demon, Baku the Whatever Demon, Ed the dog of the military, Momiji the cursed rabbit thing, and Gaara the ninja!

In…

**MIDGET FARM 2**

Why anyone would make a sequel is beyond me.

March 2006


	2. Feature Presentation

Midget Farm

The Sequel

It was your typical sunny day in the middle of nowhere. A van pulled up to an abandoned building. Out of the van got Kuro. She went up to the building's door and knocked. Ketsueki came out and walked with Kuro to the van.

"I wounded up all of them, and we have too newbies." said Kuro as she opened the van door. There KJ, Hiei, Baku, Ed Gaara, and Momiji were all tied up and had socks shoved in their mouths.

"Well I'll help you bring them in," said Ketsueki and she immediately grabbed Gaara.

Kuro grabbed onto KJ and started moving her. Her eyes glowed crimson and Kuro said, "Yes I know, you're going to kill me." After all of the midgets were on the bench outside they untied them and removed the sock.

"Not again!" yelled Ed.

"All right listen up midgets. Last time someone had to let you escape," said Ketsueki looking at Kuro.

"We went over this," said Kuro glaring at her.

"Anyway welcome back, and to the newbies welcome. Your cabin is over there, and we'll call you for dinner," said Ketsueki.

"Well I better go. I still have to think of a story as to why I took Gaara and Momiji," said Kuro and she flew off.

"Now you midgets go over there, Gaara you come with me," said Ketsueki as she went inside. Gaara slowly followed her and shut the door behind him.

"How did we end up here again?" asked KJ.

"Well you and Hiei could have used your Jagans to see Kuro from a mile away," said Baku using the little thing in his head that he calls a brain.

"Hn…" said Hiei.

"You've been here before? Why did you leave?" asked Momiji standing up on the bench.

"Look around, this isn't the best place in the world," said Ed.

"I still get the tent at night," said KJ.

"I claim the tree," said Hiei.

"Bench," said Momiji.

"Van," said Baku.

"No fair!" yelled Ed.

"Well you won't be alone on the ground, there is still Gaara," said Baku.

"Are you that stupid?" asked Hiei.

"Yea, have you heard Ketsu rant on and on about Gaara ever since she met him. No way she'll let her… love sleep on the ground." said KJ.

"Oh," said Baku.

Then Ketsueki came out and walked over to Baku, "Give up the van keys," and he slowly handed them over, "good little midget," and she went inside after patting him on the head.

"I get the bench now," said Baku.

"WAA! But-" started Momiji.

"Momiji you can sleep in half of the tent," said KJ.

"YAY!" shouted Momiji and he jumped off the bench and hugged KJ. With a puff of smoke he turned into a rabbit.

"Must he do that?" asked Ed.

"Yes!" yelled rabbit Momiji.

"All right whatever," and KJ placed him on the ground.

"So…what are we going to do?" asked Baku.

"Don't know," said Ed.

"Hey if you hate it here why don't you just use your shadow transportation?" asked rabbit Momiji.

"Because have you ever gotten a horse tranquilizer to your ass before? It isn't very comfortable," said KJ.

"Oh…" said Momiji and he turned back into a human. KJ turned around as he put his clothes on.

"We're having corn nuts for dinner tonight!" yelled Ketsueki as she came out holding five bags of corn nuts. She opened the tops of them and threw them on the ground like they were chickens. (A/N: Well this is a farm)

"With a hint of dirt?" asked Hiei.

"Yep," said Ketsueki.

"What about Gaara?" asked Momiji already picking the corn nuts up off of the ground.

"He gets tri tip and a king bed inside," said Ketsueki.

"That building can fit a king sized bed inside?" asked Ed.

"Uh…yea," said Ketsueki and she went back inside.

"I don't know if this is better or worse," said Baku.

"Ugh, I miss Kuro's cooking, even when she adds 'surprises' in the food. It is still better," said KJ.

"I agree," said Hiei.

"It isn't that bad," said Momiji eating the corn nuts he picked up.

"…ew," said Ed.

"Well it is our only food," said Baku as he ate one.

"And Bake eats food off the ground all the time," said KJ with a gulp she ate a piece. "EW! You know what screw the horse tranquilizer" and she disappeared into shadow. When she came out she was at a ramen shop. There sat Naruto eating a rather large bowl of Ramen. "Have you seen Kuro?" asked KJ.

"Yep, but she just left," said Naruto.

"Okay thanks," and she disappeared into shadow again. This time she came out she was looking at the scene of Yuki shunning Ayame, Shigure smiling at Tohru, Kyo getting his ass kicked by Kagura, Hiro and Kisa watching from the kitchen, and Haru and Hatori sipping tea. "Family reunion?" asked KJ.

"SHUN!" yelled Yuki.

"HELP!" yelled Kyo (A/N: What is with yelling four letter words?)

Hatori and Haru slurped their tea, Shigure laughed, and Hiro and Kisa walked over to KJ.

"What are you doing here?" asked Hiro.

"Have you seen Kuro?" asked KJ.

"Yes, but she just left," said Kisa, "sorry."

"Okay bye," said KJ and she slipped back into shadows. This time when she came out she was in the living room of the temple. There sat Yusuke and Bake playing video games and stuffing their faces with junk food, while Kuwabara, Jin, and Kurama watched. "Where's Kuro?" asked KJ.

"Jagan," was all Kurama said as Bake just kicked Yusuke's ass at Super Smash Bros.

"Ugh!" said KJ and she opened her third eye to be not only a midget but an alien. She should join the circus, the amazing short shadow alien! She looked around and saw her, Raine, and Cherushii all watching the hour and eight minute long AMV. She walked down the hallway and flew the door open.

"Took you ling enough to get back," said Kuro not taking her eyes off the screen.

"Welcome back KJ," said Cherushii glancing at KJ.

"Thank you Cheru. Now don't you think you're getting away with this," said KJ.

"Yea, yea, yea better sleep with my eyes open and all that jazz right?" asked Kuro as she turned around in her chair.

"Something like that," said KJ.

"HEY, KJ, WHERE IS THE SHRIMP?" yelled Yusuke from the living room.

"WHERE DO YOU THINK, BAKA?" KJ yelled back.

"OKAY," Yusuke yelled back.

"Jeez loud much?" asked Raine.

"Whatever," said KJ and she walked out to her room.

Back at the midget farm Ketsueki just gave the tri tip to Gaara. He stabbed it with his knife and held it up.

"It's black. I'll break my teeth," said Gaara.

"Well sorry for not being a chef," said Ketsueki as she flung it out the window. "Hey! Who threw that?" yelled Ketsueki out the window.

"I don't know," they all replied.

"Horse tranquilizer!" threatened Ketsueki.

"Hiei," they all replied except Hiei.

"Ugh, stupid midgets," said Ketsueki walking over to where Gaara was.

"So what are going to eat?" asked Gaara.

"I know!" said Ketsueki and she opened a closet. There was a never ending supply of Instant Ramen (don't own) and Jones soda (don't own).

"…ramen and soda? Jeez you're just like Naruto," said Gaara leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms.

"GLOMP!" yelled Ketsueki and she…well… glompped Gaara and they fell over.

Outside the 'midgets' heard a thud from inside. They looked at each other and walked into the building. There they saw an unconscious Gaara on the ground and Ketsueki was grabbing some ramen.

"Damn it you're not dead," said Ed.

"Midgets out!" yelled Ketsueki.

"What about Gaara, he's a midget too," said Hiei.

"He's special," said Ketsueki as she pulled out the horse tranquilizer. "NOW OUT!"

"Say hi to Raine for me," said Baku and they all left.

That night KJ came back to save Ed because Al called the temple and was worried.

"Why can't you take all of us?" asked Momiji.

"Yea, I'm hungry," said Baku.

"But you two ate all of the corn nuts," said Hiei.

"So…" said Baku eating another corn nut.

"Ketsu would notice if ALL of us were gone," said KJ.

"No she wouldn't, she's too busy with Gaara," said Momiji.

"Look I'll bring you back some food, but I have to get Ed back. Next Roy will call and I don't want to deal with him," said KJ grabbing onto Ed's arm and transporting.

"Then there were four," said Baku.

"There shouldn't be any," said Hiei and he went into the tree.

Later that night KJ came back with some of the dinner they had that night at the temple. Then she left and said she'll take another person back in the morning. And like she said, she came back but with Kuro to distract Ketsueki.

"Why did you bring the one responsible for us being here?" asked Hiei.

"Because she has nothing better to do. And she is bored with out you around to give afros," explained KJ.

"Which reminds me," said Kuro and she went over to Hiei and gave him an afro. "I give you Shorty McAfroboy. (A/N: See Kageryu Janganshi's Dark Tournament)" Momiji then broke down laughing his head off. "Also Yusuke and Kuwabara wouldn't shut up till Baku and Hiei were back. And Hatori threatened me if Momiji wasn't home heh, heh," said Kuro.

"So who is going back?" asked Baku.

"All of you," said KJ, "now go, follow my plan, Kuro." Kuro walked into the building and KJ got everyone in a circle. "She should come out in 5-4-3-2-1-" said KJ.

"KURO! Give Gaara back! I can use the horse tranquilizer on you!" yelled Ketsueki as Kuro came flying through the roof of the building with Gaara hardly holding on. She landed in the circle and they disappeared into the shadows. "Damn it," said Ketsueki as she came out, tranquilizer and all.

They appeared at the temple and Yusuke immediately grabbed Baku and played video games. Hiei walked over and watched.

"Now you have to get Momiji and Gaara home safely," said KJ to Kuro.

"Yea, yea, yea," said Kuro and she grabbed onto Gaara and flew out.

"So… uh where's Ketsueki?" asked Cherushii as she walked into the living room with Raine.

"Still at her farm probably," said KJ.

"Oh well, at least it won't be so loud here," said Raine.

Kuro was flying when she spotted the Village hidden in the Sand, and she dived down. She set Gaara on the ground.

"I'm free!" shouted Gaara, which scared Kuro so she took off lightning fast. She flew back to the temple and ate some food.

"So was Gaara happy?" asked Kurama.

"He shouted 'I'm free!' It scared the shit out of me," said Kuro.

"Wow that's shocking," said Cherushii.

"Next is Momiji," said KJ walking through the kitchen.

"Yea, yea, yea," said Kuro and she grabbed onto Momiji (not hugging) and flew off with him shouting 'whee' to Kuro's annoyance.

Over at the Midget Farm Ketsueki was eating ramen and drinking soda while watching stupid randomness on her laptop.

At the temple the guys were either playing or watching video games and stuffing their faces with junk food. Cherushii was looking at a magazine full of 'shiny', Raine was fiddling with her guns, and KJ was wondering what was taking Kuro so long because she was hungry.

KJ walked into the living room and asked the guys, "Do you know where Kuro is?"

"Jagan" was all Kurama replied.

"De jia vu (sp)," said Yusuke.

"Ugh," said KJ and she went in her room and watched some TV.

Kuro had just reached the main Sohma house when she saw Hatori and Haru get in his car and drive off in the direction of Shigure's house. Kuro followed them and landed behind them and landed behind them when they got out of the car.

"Oh it seems Momiji's back," said Haru turning around.

"I had s good time," said Momiji.

"Well I better g-" started Kuro until Tohru answered the door.

"Momiji! Hello Hatori, Haru oh and… Kuro," said Tohru.

"Goodbye," said Kuro she started flying until Tohru said something to catch her attention.

"Want to stay for dinner?" she asked. Kuro stopped and then slowly landed on the ground.

"Yes, yes I would love to stay for dinner," said Kuro.

"Okay," said Tohru and they all walked in.

Two hours later…

"ARGH! DAMN KURO!" yelled KJ as her stomach growled loudly for the ten millionth time.

"HAHAHA take that midget," said Kuro.

THE END


	3. Midget Farm Handbook

Midget Farm Handbook

Rules:

Obey Ketsueki

Leave Ketsueki alone when she is with Gaara

Don't try to escape or it will be the horse tranquilizer to pay.

NO whining we have no cheese.

NO committing suicide to get free. Kuro can save you. Not like she would but still.

Follow the pledge.

Don't disrespect the National Anthem.

Follow rules and well be in a slightly pleasant environment.

Remember, horse tranquilizer.

Pledge:

The greatest thing you'll ever learn

Is just to grow

And that is what thy shall yearn.

Anthem:

Song: Short People

Artist: Randy Newman

Short People got no reason  
Short People got no reason  
Short People got no reason  
To live.

They got little hands  
And little eyes  
And they walk around  
Tellin' great big lies  
They got little noses  
And tiny little teeth  
They wear platform shoes  
On their nasty little feet

Well, I don't want no Short People  
Don't want no Short People  
Don't want no Short People  
Round here.

Short People are just the same  
As you and I  
(A fool such as I)  
All men are brothers  
Until the day they die  
(It's a wonderful world)

Short People got nobody  
Short People got nobody  
Short People got nobody  
To love.

They got little baby legs  
And they stand so low  
You got to pick 'em up  
Just to say hello  
They got little cars  
That go beep, beep, beep   
They got little voices  
Goin' peep, peep, peep  
They got grubby little fingers  
And dirty little minds  
They're gonna get you every time

Well, I don't want no Short People  
Don't want no Short People  
Don't want no Short People  
'Round here.


End file.
